In search of happiness.

I had a rather strange discussion the other night about what was happiness. Now that might seem to be a very easily answered question. So I asked the person what it was that made them happy. Very quickly they gave me a list of things that would bring them happiness.

As I listened to the list I rapidly began to realise that this list would never make me happy. We are all so different that the things that make us either happy or sad will be as varied as the number of people there happen to be there at the time.

I have found it difficult to clear my mind of this conversation thinking there has surely to be something we can say about happiness that might speak to more than just myself.

So I got out my notepad and made just a few notes of what might be consistent for all of us in the pursuit of happiness. 

Happiness is Tolerance. If you become a member of the perfectionist club, be ready to live a life of disappointment often offended and lonely. Does it matter that what makes another happy would never bring a smile to my face? Not at all.

Happiness is not the absence of pain. There is no such thing as a pain-free life. In fact, emotional pain is a useful life tool that alerts you to a mismatch between values and your environment. I often think that if I just did not have this pain in my foot all would be well. But the pain is there to tell me something is not right.

Happiness is an association. If you want to be happy associate with happy people.

Happiness is not, in fact, a pursuit.   Forget about chasing happiness and you will indeed become happy.

Happiness is a state of mind. Regardless of your goals in life or where you are going, you can choose to travel your life’s journey happy or unhappy.

I share this with you knowing that probably by number two you have agreed to disagree with me. Happiness is probably in the end what each of make of it.  But there is one thing for certain in all of this.

Others can invite you to feel miserable you do not need to accept the invitation.

Have a happy day.