Schools and Students.

The Door to Healing.

I am not very sure how many if any will read this because most will be very busy with friends and family and in the midst of Christmas festivities. I am also not sure if I will be able to post tomorrow as I am not going to be on my computer.

I thought that it being a time of the year when the last thing we all want is something very serious to go back to the days when I was teaching. Two things that I always fascinating naming about teaching were the notes sent in by parents. Now some of those notes were frequently not the work of the parents but the attempt at a good forgery by the very student handing it to me. Working out which was genuine and which was not always easy. the second thing was the ongoing struggle of filling out home reports on the behaviour and achievements of students over the year. 

The need to be PC and positive in attitude was sometimes very difficult indeed So here for your joy is a sample of some of those read over the years.

"Please excuse Janette, for being absent yesterday. She was bitten on the buttocks and had to go to the dentist."

" Please excuse, Graham, if he is not quite himself today. he ate a lot of jelly and cream at a party last night and was a trifle sick."

"Please excuse, James, as he had diarrhoea in his new sandals."

"I kept Betty at home yesterday as her mother had a baby. it will not happen again."

"Please excuse, Alan, for being absent at present. He has a sore belly as he swallowed a sixpence. I will let you know if there is any change.

And teacher speak for report cards. 

Teacher                                                            Translation.

Willie tries ever so hard.                              Willie is as thick as mince!

Sometimes Willie finds                                Willie is as daft as a brush.

 it hard to concentrate.

Willie is a lively little chap.                         Willie is a right wee toe-rag!

Willie has a strong personality.                 Willie is an awkward little bugger!

Willie is a neat writer.                                  Willie cannae spell to save himself.

Willie is a most responsible boy.               Willie is responsible for most of the disruption

                                                                        in this class!

Willie has a vivid imagination.                 You should hear some of the excuses Willie

                                                                      comes up with!

Willie excels at sport.                                The only thing in Willies heid is football.

Wille is good with his hands.                    Willie cannae stay away from the girls.

Willie is a rather solitary child.                  Willie smells something awful.

To any reading this I hope you have a marvellous Christmas will be back as soon as possible.